Fun Trip To A…Sex Expo

It’s that time of year again.

Sydney is abuzz with talk about the annual Sex Expo, or…

Well, what erotic romance writer wouldn’t give up a day’s writing to venture forth into the land of sex?

Not this one. Or fellow Aussie authors, Rhian Cahill, Lexxie Couper and Maggie Nash.

Armed with huge grins and loads of excitement, off we ventured, into the great halls of Fox Studios to find out all we could about sex.

Yep, that’s us. (Cuddled up to some lovely sex organs.)

So, what did we do there? Well, we ventured from one stall to the next, looking at hundreds, thousands even, of different sex aides.

Seriously people, there are more vibrators, plugs, bullets and dildos out there than the mind can fathom. And that is just the tip of the sex toy iceberg. Can you see the red box in the photo above of the four of us – with the sex organs? That’s one of the show specialities. Buy a vibrator, get a whole lot of sex toys free. I’d guess at least every third woman we passed carried one of those boxes. And a ton of men too. The rest carried bags with similar loot. The show bags were all jam packed full of cheapo sex aides.

Then there were tons of stalls showcasing the more upmarket, trendy stuff. (And those were  a lot easier to buy, and then slip in your bag. A lot more subtle too.)

How cool are these? If the kids stumbled upon them by mistake, they’d have no clue what they were looking at. So much prettier and more refined than the classic rabbit or dolphin, huh?

This is the vibe everyone was talking about. Stall holders reported back rapturously about the wonder of sex using the we-vibe 11. Great fun for both parties, I’m told.

I won’t mention names, but a couple of the women I was with thought the glass vibes would make stunning ornaments for the mantelpiece.

Ah, yes, The fake pussy. I had the, uh, pleasure of slipping my finger into one of these. It was full of lube, so potential buyers could get the “real feel” of what it’s like to use one. My first thought on contact was, aah, that feels just like mashed up avocado. My second: I might never eat avo again. 😉 Nah, not really.

Okay, so once we’d made our way around the millions of sex toy and lingerie stores, we hit hall two. With the real life attractions. We were too late to see the live sex show, featuring three woman. A hypnosis show had replaced the fun. However, we were too busy exploring the hall to pay it much attention. There were lots of almost naked men and women offering to pose for photos with us (for a not so nominal fee.) And gorgeous women walking around in skimpy shorts, the rest of their bodies covered in body paint. Damn, they looked good.

So, here was an interesting stall. This man’s speciality is obvious. He paints with his dick.

Yes, the pic could be clearer, but I suspect RC was laughing so much, she couldn’t hold the camera steady. Seriously people, would any of you hang a painting like this on your wall? I think I’d throw up a little every time I walked past it.

I’d already left by the time this show came on, but I suspect RC, Lex and Mags enjoyed watching:

I must say, sex is fun, but after a couple of hours of intense sex like this, I was ready to go. You know the saying… too much of a good thing.

LOL, feel free to ask any quesitons. I’m pretty sure after this day of research one of us will have the answers you’re looking for.

Jess