End of the World – Lena Matthews

Two more days until the world ends!  Please welcome my special guest, Lena Matthews!  Ms. Lena happens to be one of the funniest people on this planet.  If you aren’t following her on Facebook, you need to get busy and stalk follow her. Right. Now. Go.


And now, heeeeeerrreee’s Lena….

It’s the end of the world as we know it. It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feeeeel fine! That’s not only the best part of the song, it’s also the only other part I know besides the first two lines and of course Lenny Bruce, because that’s what we all yelled at the top of our lungs.


So according to a bunch of dead guys, the world’s ending…again…and like the song says, I feel fine. I mean come on, some pretty epic things have happened in my lifetime. We elected a bi-racial president, not once but twice!  That thingamajig landed on Mars. The Internet. MTV…although now the M doesn’t stand for Music anymore. And zombies attacked!!! Okay…that didn’t happen but it would have been really cool. That being said, if the world does end in a couple days there are only a few things I’ll be really sad about…


1)     I never did get to see The Cosby Show reunion episode I was hoping for, which would feature Rudy marrying Bud.

2)     Marriage Equality still hasn’t passed in California yet.

3)     I didn’t get to flash Joe Biden.


I mean if those are my top three regrets in life then I have to say, I still feel fine…but…then some cruel, cruel woman (Hi Valerie) asked me if I had the opportunity to do one thing on my Bucket List before the clock struck doom-thirty, what would it be? And she would not accept flash Joe Biden as an answer.


So I immediately begin to ponder all the dirty things I haven’t done that I sort of wish I would have, but then I thought, seriously if the world was going to end tomorrow the last thing I would be thinking is, “Damn I wish I would have went ass to mouth” (not saying that that’s on my sexual bucket list). Of course I have lofty little things like skating at Rockefeller Center during Christmas around that huge tree or taking a ride on a gondola in Venice with my hubby but those are things I thought of late in life. So if I’m gonna pick something I wanted to do since I was a child and that’s learn how to surf.


When I was kid our local station, KTLA, used show old black and white movies and films from the 60’s, so I grew up watching Frankie and Annette and Gidget flicks. I’ve seen all the Gidget movies. I own them all on VHS and I loved the TV show. My love for Gidget was so bad I wanted to be a black Gidget, Bidget, even though I can only doggy paddle and don’t really like the beach, but surfing is still really high on my list.


I want to surf. I want to stand up on a board in the water just once. I want to call some hot dude Moondoggie. I want to be Bidget. There’s still time. Lots of time because the world isn’t going to end on the 22nd. So I have no excuse…other than the fact I might want to learn how to swim first.


You know what? I think I’m going to do it. Next year I’m going to take a swim class (a couple) then a surfing class…then I’m going to work on fulfilling my adult long dream of flashing Joe Biden. You only live once, right!

What about you? What’s the one thing you’ll regret not doing, if anything? Post your answer below and be entered to win a free download of any of my previously published books.


Oh, and if you see Joe Biden, flash him one time for me!




Today’s Contest

Prize: Ebook from Lena’s Backlist.

How to Enter: Comment, like me on facebook, WHATEVER YOU WANT IHers!

Grand Prize Contest

Prize: $100 Gift Card

Grand prize winners will be drawn on December 22nd, 2012. To enter you can like us on Facebook, follow on twitter, tweet, and comment! You can tweet and comment once a day for the duration of the contest. In order to enter click the party logo below, or enter on Facebook. Good luck!

End of the World Grand Prize Contest Entry Form

57 Responses to “End of the World – Lena Matthews”

  1. Cherie Clark Says:

    I would love to ski. I have had the boots on and all that but i have chickened out every time. Sky diving would be fun too.

  2. If the world is ending, i want liposuction so i’ll leave a good looking corpse

  3. Dawna Newman Says:

    LOL, will you bail me out if I do? What I regret not doing well, finishing college. That is my biggest regret. this year I got to fix my other regret, with my ex hubby and we are together again so this Christmas is a wonderful one for me and our son.

  4. I want to go out smexing it up. 🙂

  5. Hmmm I would love to go to disney world in florda.

  6. If the end of the world is coming I would like to sit down with Christine Feehan, and find out how her Dark series ends. I have been reading that series for years, and invested a lot of time and money in it not to know what finally happens.

  7. I think I’d miss not traveling around the world as much as I would have liked and possibly living in the UK for a few years.


  8. Mary Preston Says:

    So many places yet to visit, people to meet. I have not had tea with the Queen yet.


  9. arella3173 Says:

    Oh boy… I’ll just go out and say it…. if the world is ending… I’m gonna die without having popped my cherry. LOL… sad. sad indeed. here I read all this smut and still a cherry. No cherry popping for me. oh well. :p


  10. I’d love to go whale watching in Alaska. The pictures/videos are always beautiful and I would love to see it for myself.

  11. I would have loved to travel more. There are so many places I would love to see, but don’t have the money to do it.

  12. Oh, I loved Gidget. I made my kids watch them and I have all the movies on VHS too! When you head to that beach, call, I’ll join you. That is if you don’t mind a slightly older woman who forgets she’s not in her 20s along.

    As for regrets and something I haven’t done. None. Just because I haven’t done something doesn’t mean that it’s not on a yet list. Of course, right off the top of my head I can’t think of anything pressing that I haven’t done, just things that I’d like to do some time but not a have to do some time. Does that make sense?

  13. Lol I’ve never had the urge to flash anyone (although I am pretty proud of my boobies). I have been trying to thin mall week of something I would want to do and I can’t think of anything. So I’m going to be boring and say that I’d buy a ton of books since I wouldn’t have to pay the bill. I know I wouldn’t have time to read them but I’d own them. 🙂


  14. Jamey St. Peters Says:

    Flash him? I mean Lena I expected more… Like molestation attempts or something. But I feel you on the Gidget thing. Loved those movies on AMC. Take it from a former swimmer- invest in good lotion and swimmer’s shampoo cos the water can be an enemy on a sista.

    • Jamey St. Peters Says:

      Oh and I forgot to answer your question- um I guess I regret not going back to school. I left cos I hadn’t a clue what I wanted to do and I still don’t but I could at least have the paper that says I’m clueless but wasted plenty of money and time listening to new ideas and philosophies.

  15. Marketa (Ketaj1316) Says:

    Lena so feeling you on the Beach movies of the 60’s thought I was the only one.
    My one regret would be not finishing my degree, But like you I think there’s still time. So January 1 I’ll be looking into it.

  16. Tina Gregory Says:

    My one big regret is I kept putting off finishing college . Yes, I can still go back and finish it’s just harder now that I have one child in college now and another about to enter..I might need to start dancing to pay my tuition lol

  17. gale.ross.7@facebook.com Says:

    I’ll regret not traveling as much as I would like. I just got my passport and I only have one stamp in it. I definitely want to add more.

  18. serenitykingsblog Says:

    Hi Lena,

    Loved the interview. If you saw how ‘Bud’ looked now I don’t think you would want her to marry him Lol. There are two things I really want to do: Establish a help group for young ladies battle self-esteem issues, and the other is learn to fly a plane/helicopter.


  19. i would like to see my brother i never meed my sister was going through stuff of my dads and then found out that we have brother and i want to see him and then see my side of the family which is over 110 and counting and then see my dads family it
    about 80 and counting

  20. I would regret not going bungee jumping although I am afraid of heights

  21. Besides hot monkey sex with Vin Diesel, I want to visit Loch Ness and catch a glimpse of Nessie! Since I was a kid, I’ve always watched every documentary on the Loch Ness Monster–okay, fine! I still watch ’em! Even the garbage, makes me want to yack Syfy movie at 2 am! Still…don’t tell me she doesn’t exist!

  22. I regret I didn’t meet you sooner! But I did get to meet you at Romanticon and meeting all of you rated right up there with my Paris trips in the 90’s!

  23. I’ll regret not going to Greece…that’s the one thing I wanted to do…and if the world DOES end tomorrow, I’m gonna be severely pissed that I didn’t get to see my best friend and his boyfriend get married (the date is set for next summer)…just sayin…

  24. I would love to see dolphins and go surfing. I’ve only been to the beach once and would love to go again. I would have loved to travel all over the world and see all the things to see.

  25. Desta Houston Says:

    Not going to Jerusalem.

  26. I would like to spend the time in a well stocked hot air balloon (or commandeer the Goodyear Blimp! ) sailing above the world until the end. I’ve seen dolphins and whales, I’ve travelled, but I’ve never been in a hot air balloon (of the Goodyear Blimp!)

  27. Lena, I don’t think I’m flashing anyone, even if I see Mr. Biden–sorry! But I will regret not having more time because my TBR? I’m never getting through that then 😦 I’d better get back to reading–only have a few hours left, right?? 😀

  28. I would love to see Ireland and Scotland-or even the Pacific Ocean. Have been east, but not to the west coast.

  29. Rhonda Wolf Says:

    The only thing I can think of is, my mountain of a tbr pile going unread. I can’t believe you only want to flash Mr. Biden.

  30. I would want all my children to visit me one more time, last time they were all here was 2 years ago for a wedding!
    I would also regret not having enough time to read all my books (even though I just got rid over a few hundred to make space :D)

  31. Wanda Dixon Says:

    I regret not having finished college.

  32. I want to read more….and swim with dolphins. And see the Amazon. SO much I won’t do if the world ends. But if I see Biden I’ll flash him for you.

    Teehee. 😉

  33. Lena, I don’t know what your fascination is with Uncle Joe. You and the girls would probably give the poor man a heart attack! I regret not being more adventerous. I’ve also wanted to go skydiving and I passed up the opportunity to go parasailing while I was in Cancun.

  34. Maybe not being able to travel more

  35. trying to have a child earlier in life so I would have had more time to have medicine help. As it is I am childless and about to have a hysterectomy next month to correct other health problems.

  36. I would want to see Lena flash Joe Biden……. and world peace..

    Go Bidget!

  37. itmfiddler Says:

    I regret everything I did and everything I didnt. I’m thinking the end of the world can’t come too soon LOL

  38. I would like to try water skiing.

  39. Flash Joe Biden. That cracked me up.

  40. OMG!!! I laughed so hard I nearly peed my pants!! I had to read that to my mom and she laughed her butt off too!! I have to say on my bucket list is cover Clay Matthews in chocolate and lick it off!! (And if you saw his little dance on Sunday you KNOW I’d make him do a little striptease first!!)
    Again LOVED the post!!!

  41. I think something that I will would regret is not telling some people who have wronged me in some way off. I generally don’t let people know when they have disappointed me or hurt me so I would really want to let those people know.

  42. I’d regret not traveling.I’ve always wanted to go to Australia.

  43. I always wanted to learn to play the violin.

  44. Susan Romito Says:

    Great post! Going to like you on FB right now. I really don’t have many big regrets. I guess one would be not staying in touch with people I wish I would have.

  45. I love Gidget, my favorite is Gidget Goes Hawaiian! I actually have all 3 movies on VHS and DVD. The two things I would regret the most are not traveling to Europe for my 40th b-day like I planed and biting the bullet and completing a novel!!!

  46. Moondoggie….. Oh Moondoggie…..the bigger they are the dopier they fall…

    Love love love Gidget… Have it on DVD!

    Years ago when I was working at the Gap in NYC Frankie Avalon, his father and his son came in looking to buy something very quickly . His son has blonde hair, he has black hair and his father has gray hair. They all looked alike and they were all good looking. Loved those movies.

    As for my list of things I want to do….
    Fall in love and have a baby. I’ve never been in love hence the reason I don’t have any children

  47. My regret would be not visiting Paris, France, I’ve always wanted to but haven’t yet. Love your books, Lena and enjoyed reading your bucket list 🙂


  48. I would like to sky dive once but I’m super afraid of heights. Yikes 🙂

  49. I love the fast car idea. That’s definitely something I would do. 🙂

  50. I would regret not traveling more and showing my children more of the world.

  51. Um if the world ends I’m gonna be sad I never read the end of all the book series I’m in the middle of

  52. There are two things I am going to do this coming year that I have never done before.
    The small one is I am going to be able to park in my garage. Have owned this house 10 years(this coming summer) an have never once parked in the garage because of all the stuff(keeping it polite)in there.
    The big one is I am finally going to submit one of my stories to a publisher(or a dozen). Been writing things since I was a teenager. I’m in my 40s now. I think it’s time I did something with all those works.

  53. Diana Johnson Says:

    Lena I love your books
    My bucket list is to see the “Northern Lights” aka aurora borealis up close and personal, to cruise to Alaska, to retire in Spain, just to name a few.

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