Some of you may have seen the scene made by the Joyfully Reviewed bunny at RAW 2012 this past weekend in Pittsburgh. If you didn’t see it, you may have heard the rumors, and I’m here to tell you… it’s all true. I know what you’re thinking. I was aghast myself, sitting there, watching this cute, furry little creature be led down the road to perdition by one of our very own. Here is his tale of woe…
It all started when the bunny noticed Mari Carr enjoying a couple of mimosas and having a good time at breakfast on Sunday. Now, I can’t claim to know what was running through that fuzzy little head of his, but I do know the bunny started out with a very grumpy expression on his snout and an irritated turn to his whiskers. I think he was kind of angry, but you can judge for yourself. Doesn’t he look grumpy to you? (And I think his nose has been broken more than once, which makes me wonder what buns gets up to when Joy isn’t looking.)
Perhaps he was hungover from the night before. I do know he still had a rather pathetic, used-up glow bracelet around his neck and I’m not even sure he got any sleep! So maybe, when he saw Mari and her empty mimosa glass, he thought he’d try “a bit of the hair of the dog…” etc. I’m really not sure, since he doesn’t talk. Well… he didn’t talk to ME, but that could be because he was being rather haughty with people he’d only just met. He seemed to have better rapport with some of the other folks sitting at our table. (He even got a little fresh with Jayne Rylon! More on that later.)
The next thing any of us knew, buns was getting bizzy with the mimosas. Some even say he did a pole dance around the glass stem, but I can’t be sure of the truth of that, since my head was turned. However, I did see many, many empty glasses all around him. And I think I heard a few hiccups coming from his direction, though when I turned my head to look quick, he’d frozen in place. He’s good. Really good.
You’d never know what evil lurks in that furry little heart, but each time I looked back at him, he was up to some new mischief… Well… see for yourself. I’ve got photographic proof of just some of his antics! I’m sure there’s more that I didn’t see. Probably a lot more. *tsk, tsk*
He looks so innocent and that white color is anything but pure. Notice the way he’s kind of wobbly on his paws? But I will say that after he got a little alcohol into him, he stopped looking quite so grumpy. He was definitely feeling no pain when he started gambling…
It started innocently enough. A few orderly raffle tickets for a worthy cause. We all thought it was kind of cute. He wiped his paws on a napkin and sat quietly while they called numbers for hours on end. Well, it seemed like hours. Especially to buns. He started sweating and getting agitated.
He was hopping all around the table, gnawing on things and eating the floral centerpiece as each number came up and none of them were his. It was really disturbing. They continued to call numbers and his agitation increased to the point where I moved my chair back from the table, afraid of what he was going to do. He was hopping mad. Or maybe just hopping. Rather drunkenly too, actually, making a mess of his tickets and causing quite a scene.
Just look at how he ended up when he they called the last of the numbers and he realized he hadn’t won. yeah, the grumpy look is back. Buns is not a good loser.
Although, he wasn’t quite as angry as before. I think the alcohol had a calming effect. See how his eyes are sort of half-closed? He was definitely feeling no pain and once he got over the devestation of not winning the half-naked fairy statue he wanted (though just WHY he wanted it, he refused to divulge), he started looking around the table and that’s when he started hitting on Jayne.
It was kind of cute, actually. I think in his half-drunken state, he mistook her for a long lost cousin or something, even though she wasn’t wearing her ears. Jayne, to her credit, told him repeatedly that she was married and that she didn’t do furry, but he really wasn’t listening. It got to the point that she had to have a very stern talk to him. All of us at the table were kind of shocked, but it seemed to work. She told him straighten up and hop right. She also gave him some harsh truths about his public drunkeness and gambling habit (apparently this isn’t the first time she’s seen him lose big at the track).
It was really awkward to watch the intervention, but it seemed to work. At least for the moment. I don’t know what happened after we left or if he’s still on the straight and narrow, but when I last saw him, he had his snout in a cup of Susan Romito’s Starbuck’s coffee and was doing his best to sober up. I konw Mari was trying to be sympathetic, but I think even she was kind of appalled by buns’ behavior.
I won’t call him a degenerate or even a sexual deviant (though what he did to the glass stem was kind of disgusting from all accounts and his cross-species flirting was totally over the top), but I will say that many of us who witnessed this behavior were very… disappointed in him. We thought he was all cute and fuzzy. He looks so innocent! But under that furry white skin lies a drunkard and a pervert and that’s no lie.
Jayne had to take his car keys away and I only hope we can all learn something from this story. Not everything that looks innocent and cute, is. And not everyone can handle their mimosas like our friend, Mari.
Oh, and if you ever see buns at a conference, be careful around alcohol and raffle tickets. Friends don’t let friends drive drunk, bet too much or hit on someone who isn’t even the same species.